Matthew

There are events that happen in the world that serve as wake up calls, events that make you aware that the world can be an ugly, horrifying place. The first such event in my life was the murder of Matthew Shepard. The murder woke me up to a reality I knew nothing about -hate crimes. The murder woke up the country, and the entire world.

*

Matthew Shepard was in the Fireside Bar in Laramie, Wyoming, on the night of October 6, 1998; he was sat at the bar, sipping a beer. Also in the bar were Aaron McKinney and Russell Henderson, seated in the back of the bar. McKinney and Henderson noticed Matthew sitting at the bar; they went up to Matthew and began a conversation with him. After chatting a bit, McKinney and Henderson offered to give Matthew a ride home, which he accepted. The three men then left the bar and piled into a truck.

The offer of a ride home was in actually a plot to ambush Matthew. McKinney and Henderson targeted Matthew Shepard specifically. They wanted to “teach him a lesson” for being gay. The attack upon Matthew began in the truck. As Russell Henderson drove the truck, Aaron McKinney beat Matthew with a .357 magnum pistol in the back seat of the truck.

Henderson drove the truck down a lone country road, and turned off into a desolate area, which came to a dead end at a buck fence. At this point, all three men got out of the truck. The beating continued, and Matthew was tied to the fence at his wrists.

Once bound, the killers continued to beat Matthew senseless with the butt of the gun. He sustained several blows to the head, the last of which crushed his brain stem and partially tore off his right ear. McKinney and Henderson then took off Matthew’s shoes, so he couldn’t run after them. McKinney and Henderson then got back in their truck and drove away, leaving Matthew Shepard for dead.

Matthew was found the next day, eighteen hours later, by a man biking through the area. The man noticed a figure lying on the ground, near the fence; as it was October, the man thought the figure was a scarecrow. The closer he got to the fence, he suddenly saw hair. It was then that he realized that the figure on the ground was actually a person. There lay Matthew, still tied to the fence, in a coma, barely clinging to life.


The Sherriff’s office was called to the scene. The responding officer, Reggie Fluty, noted the buck fence, a bush nearby, and a doe lying near the bush. Here officer Fluty recounts the scene:



Officer Fluty cut the ropes that held Matthew to the fence. She noted that Matthew’s entire face was bloody, except for where Matthew had cried during the night.

Matthew was taken to Ivinson Memorial Hospital in Laramie, Wyoming. One of the doctors on duty that night recounted the severity and rarity of Matthew’s injuries. Injuries like Matthew’s are normally seen in patients who have been in an 80 mile an hour car crash, not from a beating. As Matthew’s injuries required a higher level of trauma care than Ivinson Memorial could provide, he was flown to Poudre Hospital in Fort Collins, Colorado.

Matthew’s parents Dennis and Judy, who were working in Saudi Arabia, were notified that their son was gravely ill, and they needed to get the next flight to the U.S. They quickly flew home to Colorado to be with their son. They had no idea that their son had been attacked; Matthew’s father Dennis assumed that Matthew had been hurt in a car accident. This was no accident. It was pre-meditated murder. 
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Once they arrived at the hospital, Matthew’s mother Judy said that Matthew was unrecognizable.

The future of Matthew Shepard was unknown at that point. Would he survive? Would he still be the Matthew his friends and family knew him to be?

*

I remember hearing about the attack on Matthew Shepard. Along with the rest of the country, I was shocked to learn of the attack. I was horrified that this act had been perpetrated on a fellow human being. I prayed for Matthew, and I prayed for his family.

My thoughts also went out to my best friend at the time, a male friend, who is gay. I will refer to this person as Miguel, to protect his true identity.

I became worried for Miguel when I learned of the attack on Matthew Shepard. The case ignited homophobia across the country, from churches, businesses, politicians, and the public at large. For a time, there were many attacks on gay men across the country. If you were gay, there was a target on your back.

I remember going out to lunch with Miguel one day, after the news of the attack had broken. It was a topic that was close in our minds. We were in downtown Indianapolis, in a safe, LGBTQ friendly part of town, to eat lunch. Miguel and 
I found a parking spot on the busy street, and walked a few blocks to the restaurant.

As we walked to the restaurant, I remember feeling nervous, yet I did not know why. The further we walked, I realized why.

The environment at that time, that day, on that street, was contentious at best. In that part of the city, which was known as the LGBTQ mecca in Indianapolis, the atmosphere was saturated in tension.

Members of the LGBTQ community were engaged in shouting matches with church members whose sole purpose for being there was to spread their religious message of homophobia to the masses. We saw signs and heard messages like these….

As we walked towards our destination, I grew increasingly afraid for Miguel. People on both sides of the issue argued and yelled at one another as if the loudest one yelling would win the argument.

In retrospect, Miguel and I should not have been there. Fist fights broke out all around us. As a gay male, it was not safe for Miguel to be there at that time. It felt like nowhere in the country was safe.

Unsure of what to do in such a combative atmosphere, I instinctively grabbed Miguel’s hand. We walked down the street, pretending to be boyfriend and girlfriend.  To my surprise, it worked. We were left alone. Nobody bothered Miguel. Everyone assumed we were a couple. Miguel was safe.

The time that Miguel and I spent over lunch was strained. We knew what awaited us when we left the restaurant. Miguel was afraid, and I was scared for him. I assured Miguel that I was here for him, and that I would do anything and everything in my power to keep him safe.

After lunch we left the restaurant and began the walk back to our car, which was parked a few blocks away. While we’d had our lunch, the hostility level on the street had risen exponentially. 

Whenever he felt threatened or uncomfortable, Miguel took my hand. I was glad to hold his hand, to keep him safe. 
I understood that I was acting as Miguel’s “beard”, a shield, a protection, to protect him from the onslaught of hate that would have come his way had his sexual orientation been known or revealed.

Looking back, I remember feeling bad for Miguel that day, feeling such fear and hatred, having to deny who and what he was, even for the walk to and from the restaurant. I also understood his need to protect himself. I was glad to be there for him. I was relieved he was safe.

I cannot imagine what Miguel felt that day, to be met with such hatred for something he cannot change. I cannot even begin to fathom what Matthew Shepard felt that night as he was being beaten, pleading for his life.

*

As this was before the time of the 24 hour news cycle, people around the country read newspapers, magazines, and the evening national news reports to learn the latest on Matthew’s condition. There were candlelight vigils across the country to pray for him.

Sadly, Matthew never regained consciousness. Matthew Wayne Shepard died on October 12, 1998, six days after he was abducted. He was survived by his father Dennis, mother Judy, and brother Logan.

Candlelight vigils were held across the country to honor Matthew’s memory.

Two days after Matthew’s death, there was a vigil in Washington, D.C. Many celebrities came to speak at the event. Ellen Degeneres, who had come out the year before, made an impassioned speech at the vigil:


As for the murderers, Aaron McKinney and Russell Henderson are in prison, serving two life terms.

After Matthew’s passing, news came out of Matthew’s survival of a previous attack on his life, which happened years before. On a high school trip to Morocco, during a night time stroll, he was followed back to his hotel by a group of six men. The men pulled Matthew aside, robbed him, gang raped him, and stole his shoes.

Twice in his life, Matthew was attacked and left for dead. Twice in his life, the perpetrators of these crimes stole his shoes.

*

October 12, 2018 marks the twentieth anniversary of Matthew’s death. His attack and murder remains the most famous hate crime against a gay man in the United States.

After Matthew’s murder, people watched for a change in hate crime laws in the United States. There were no changes to the federal hate crime laws until in 2009, eleven years after the murder. It was then that President Barack Obama passed the Matthew Shepard/James Byrd Jr. Hate Crimes Prevention Act, which adds specification of crimes motivated by gender, or sexual orientation.

Twenty years later, the United States is a very different country. In 2015 the Supreme Court of the United States made same-sex marriage legal across the country. While this was a landmark decision for the nation, there is still a fight for fair employment and civil rights protections for the LGBTQ community.

The LGBTQ community remains at risk of discrimination and acts of violence. The Human Rights Campaign offers the following data:

“The CDC’s National Intimate Partner and Sexual Violence Survey found for LGB people:

*44 percent of lesbians and 61 percent of bisexual women experience rape, physical violence, or stalking by an intimate partner, compared to 35 percent of heterosexual women
*26 percent of gay men and 37 percent of bisexual men experience rape, physical violence, or stalking by an intimate partner, compared to 29 percent of heterosexual men…
*The 2015 U.S. Transgender Survey found that 47% of transgender people are sexually assaulted at some point in their lifetime."


The LGBTQ community continues to see hate crimes perpetrated against them:

*Last year was the deadliest on record for the LGBT community, according to a new report from the National Coalition of Anti-Violence Programs (NCAVP). Homicides resulting from anti-LGBT hate crimes saw an 86% spike, from 28 in 2016 to 52 in 2017)….
*Transgender women of color make up the largest sector of victims of hate-based homicide. Last year saw at least 27 transgender Americans murdered, with all but three were women of color. In addition, the homicide rate for gay/bi cisgender men increased 500%, from four in 2016 to 20 in 2017.



In the years following Matthew Shepard’s murder, his parents, Dennis and Judy Shepard, began the Matthew Shepard Foundation. At a Foundation event, Judy remarked on the work of the foundation:

“The reason that we do this work is because, not only do we hope that what happened to Matt stops happening; it’s that we want the two young men who did that to Matt to stop occurring as well.”

In her recent article, Diane Anderson Minshall wrote about the importance of the Matthew Shepard Foundation:

“Judy and Dennis Shepard took their son’s tragedy and built a foundation to support queer and trans kids, to move LGBTQ rights to the forefront, and to make something good out of something so heartbreakingly tragic. In the decades since, many other organizations have also become dedicated to making sure our youth aren’t just surviving but thriving.”

*

It is said that art is a reflection of the culture and of humanity itself. Several pieces of art have been created about Matthew Shepard.

Days after the murder in 1998, members of the Tectonic Theater Company went to Laramie, Wyoming to interview the town about the murder. The comments of the townspeople became a play, entitled: “The Laramie Project.” Twenty years later, the play continues to be performed by high schools and colleges throughout the country. In 2002, the play was turned into a movie. 


In 2012 a book, “October Mourning: A Song for Matthew Shepard” came out. Written by Leslea Newman, it is a collection of sixty eight poems about the murder. She was the keynote speaker for the University of Wyoming for their Pride week, days after Matthew was killed.

“Using her poetic imagination, the author creates fictitious monologues from various points of view, including the fence Matthew was tied to, the stars that watched over him, the deer that kept him company, and Matthew himself.”

In 2014, the film “Matt Shepard is a Friend of Mine” made its debut. Michele Josue, a documentary filmmaker, knew Matthew in high school. Many of Matthew’s friends are featured in the film, as well as Matthew’s parents Dennis and Judy. Many photos and videos from the Shepard family archive are featured in the film. The movie is now streaming on Hulu.

In 2016, the oratorio “Considering Matthew Shepard” made its debut. It was composed by Craig Hella Johnson, leader of the Conspirare vocal group, who performed the oratorio. Leslea Norman’s book was used as a source for the work. 

“….a wildly diverse piece that does a lot more. It lifts you up, throws you into the scene of the crime and messy aftermath, sends you into a researcher’s sketch biography of Matthew’s life and finally steps back to protest the injustice of the act but also to ask something more from the society that allowed it to happen.”




I own both movies mentioned above, “The Laramie Project” and “Matt Shepard is a Friend of Mine.” I watch them every October, to remember Matthew, to contemplate what his horrific death has taught us as a people, to remind the world to never forget his story.

*

The murder of Matthew Shepard has stuck with me. It opened my eyes to the fact that the LGBTQ community does not have equal rights, and that anyone in the LGBTQ community could be killed for being their authentic self.

Looking back on that time, twenty years ago, I cannot help but think about that afternoon with Miguel. I am thankful that I got to know about the murder of Matthew Shepard with Miguel. I saw things through the lens of his perspective, through Miguel’s eyes. I learned about the hate and discrimination Miguel faces every day for just being who he is. 
I learned he is not alone. I learned about the depths of homophobia and hate. It was hate that killed Matthew Shepard. Hate in the form of homophobia.

In those days, I was completely green. I didn’t know that coming out, divulging who you are and how you identify, could literally be a matter of life and death.

For years I saw injustices towards the LGBTQ community, and yet I did nothing about it. I felt it wasn’t my place because I am straight (heterosexual.) I thought, “Yes, I have a gay friend, but I’m not gay. It’s not my issue, it’s their issue.” But 
I was wrong. Civil rights, equal rights, are my issue. They are everyone’s issue.

Two years ago, I learned of my true sexual orientation, demisexuality, which falls into the Q, or “queer” umbrella term of the LGBTQ community. What I once saw as a concern for others now concerns me personally. While I don’t exactly feel part of the LGBT club, I am a member of the LGBTQ community. Where LGBTQ rights are threatened, my rights are threatened.

 *


Dennis and Judy Shepard have never buried their son’s remains, for fear that his burial site might be desecrated. Twenty years later, Matthew will finally be laid to rest at the National Cathedral in Washington, D. C. The service will be held on Friday, October 26, 2018.

“A lot has changed in the 20 years since Matthew was abducted, tied to a fence and left to die…
A lot has changed, but not everything has changed. It felt really important for us to say that we believe L.G.B.T.Q. people are beloved children of God, not in spite of their identities 
but because of who they are — who God created them to be.”
-Mariann Edgar Budde, the bishop of the Episcopal Diocese of Washington




The murder of Matthew Shepard was a heinous crime that shocked the world with its brutality. We cannot forget his murder. We cannot be blind to the fact that murders of the LGBTQ community to continue to happen around the world.

The murder of Matthew Shepard served as a wake-up call to millions around the world. I pray we remain vigilant, and stay awake.


“For those of us who knew him, Matt’s story will never grow old,
because the pain of losing him is still fresh, like it happened yesterday-
and the hate that killed him is still here today.”
-Michele Josue

Matthew Wayne Shepard
1976-1998






Resources:

The Laramie Project movie, in its entirety: 

Matt Shepard is a Friend of Mine:

Considering Matthew Shepard:

Matthew Shepard Foundation:


Articles:
“He Continues to Make a Difference: Commemorating the Life of Matthew Shepard”

Teaching Tolerance: “The Book of Matthew”:

"Matthew Shepard's Parents Made Sure He Did Not Die in Vain":

"20 Years Later: How Matthew Shepard's Murder Became America's Window Into Hate"

"Matthew Shepard's Children":


LGBTQ Advocacy Organizations:
Human Rights Campaign: https://www.hrc.org/

PFLAG-Parents, Families/Friends of Lesbians and Gays: https://www.pflag.org/

GLAAD-Gay and Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation: https://www.glaad.org/

The Trevor Project: https://www.thetrevorproject.org

It Gets Better Project:  https://itgetsbetter.org/

National Center for Transgender Equality: https://transequality.org/

ACLU-American Civil Liberties Union: https://www.aclu.org/









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